Ladies: Jason Chambers is Engaged! Nooooo!

Terrible, terrible news, ladies.

Jason “Man Candy” Chambers, hunky co-host of the show “Human Weapon” is engaged.  He's 18-5-2 as a professional Mixed Martial Arts fighter, his last win coming by first round rear naked choke,

James Hergott, President of Owned Entertainment, Inc., is your party-crashing messenger. Now that’s “tear up your diary” sort of news for most of you.  But before you light a room full of teacup candles and take that last, slow bubble bath ride to the lightweight at the end of the tunnel, check out his lady:

Jason’s future bride is 31-year-old Larissa Meek, former Miss Missouri Teen USA.  In 2003, she starred in Average Joe: Hawaii, where she revealed what we all already knew: it’s a little presumptuous for a geek to expect much from a former beauty queen.

But the payoff for you, ladies, is that Ms. Meek used to date Fabio.  The Fabio.  The Fabio who had reconstructive seagull nose surgery in between the dips and rises of his rollercoaster.  That means Ms. Meek won’t be interfering with your heavyweight heartthrob anymore.  So fire up your copy of Gentle Rogue and dream again.

Another reason to relax?  It’s not like this was a big surprise.  You’ve had time to prepare a coping mechanism or two.  According to Larissa, the two are expecting twins in December.  So while Chambers is enjoying “the twins,” and the couple is expecting twins, the best you can probably hope for is to model your life after the Twins, a Midwest baseball team that seems to do pretty well each year on a very modest budget.